... lacrimae sanguis animae sunt ...

29 December 2008

Music, poetry, and other selfish affairs...

Music is on the air. I can feel it wherever I go. And every single day I get home straight to my guitars and the only thing I want is to translate everything into music. Actually, I wish I had a small recorder in my mind, so that I could save every new idea in all the very moments they come up to my mind.

As I don't have one, I just write down some of the ideas, and lapidate them in the following days. And up to here I'm talking only about music. Poetry comes next. And at times it doesn't even come. I think music is a complete art. Therefore lyrics are a plus, something else; a fantastic thing, but not essencial.

I usually work on some musical stuff, instrumental ideas actually. And after all, if it fits, I try to write a poem which may complete the message I want to conceive. I never play my works in my gigs. There's no special reason for so, but in fact I think I compose and write for an unknown expectator. It doesn't mean I don't show the good results I get sometimes. It's just that I don't feel ready to play them live.

So, as a way of letting it go, of opening the dam, I post some lyrics here and in my fotolog. I don't expect critics, good ones and bad one either. I cannot deny it's good when someone tells me he is touched by something I created. Mr. Gilmour has said that "you only write for yourself and anything else is a bonus. Art is a selfish thing. If you aim what you call art at people, you won’t please anybody." Well, he's totally right.

I've been recording some of my songs lately. The ones I really think are not that bad I usually show to a couple of close mates. I show them because I feel it's time for the message to be sent. A usual and friendly reaction is what always comes afterwards. I prefer when people either tell me what they honestly think about my song or say nothing.

Just below, you've got the lyrics of my latest song, and below it link where you download my homemade version of it from. Please keep in mind I've got no good tone for singing, though my voice is tuned. That record was made with very precarious stuff, including a low quality "camelô" PC microphone, an audio board which is inapropriate for recordings and an acoustic guitar with old strings. Even so, it was made the best possible way, and I've struggled to deal with the troubles.

I don’t want to believe
Renan Ferreira

A cup of coffee, the keys on the desk,
The locks, the doorsteps,
And it just looks like another day

The same paper boy on his bike,
Brings the same old news and rides
His own way

Strange people passing by
And I’m just another crazy mind
Walking down the street

The same beggar on the corner asks
And I, always full of tasks,
Have never even looked at him

Oh, this could have been just another morning
Oh, and it wouldn’t have been so weepy
Yeah, this could have been just like another day
So that I could have gone to bed the same way

I get there and walking among graves
I feel
I feel so desolate

Gulls on the sky remind me
Of the sea
And you with me

I don’t wanna read your name
On that gravestone
I don’t wanna believe

I’d rather keep a good
Than live in total misery

(As you go to this page, you don't need to download the song. There will be a mini-player there.)

posted by Renan C. Ferreira at 7:57:00 AM 2 comments

26 December 2008

Another year is gone. And it was a pretty different year for me. My life has change in many ways. And so my mind has. In the university, I found out I had to study harder, otherwise I'd not pass. I nearly failed in Literature, but I always learn a lot by my mistakes.
Concerning job, it was a stable year. I got four groups in 3 different institutions, which has given loads of experience. I could say I've improved all my learning skills, and my teaching skills as well. Next year I'll be "thrown in" the first of my practice terms (estágios). I'll face 30 or more children who will probably be starving for my brain. May God help me!
In my parallel universe - music - which is a hobby/carreer I simply can't help keeping on with, it was a great year. I've bought a new electric guitar (a professional one) but since Quarto de Banho - the rock band I take part in - hasn't played this year, I haven't had any chance to perform a gig with it. On the other hand, Os Absortos - the acoustic trio I've been playing with for about 2 years - has gained ground and a fair position in the Pelotas' musical nightlife. We made more than 20 gigs and our next year's plans are to record a demo CD and expand our territory.
This year was very nice for my family too. We bought a car and moved to our first "own home" in 14 years. Everybody's ok about health and, to my mind, we get on really well with each other. Well, I have no complaints for 2008 at all. Although not everythong came through as I expected, it wasn't bad. I just hope 2009 is as surprising, good and unusual as 2008 was.
See ya in my next post!
posted by Renan C. Ferreira at 12:25:00 AM 0 comments