... lacrimae sanguis animae sunt ...

13 May 2008

Am I able to this?

I'm not good at talking about love. I mean talking about relationship. That's because I've never managed well with this stuff. I think it has something to do with my own personality: I've got to keep loose.
I haven't had many girlfriends. In fact, I'd say I've had just one. With all the others I've never gone longer than "ficar". The one I've had hasn't respected my space and I couldn't take the relationship any longer. I've always been like that. It's something natural and necessary for me. I like having someone, but I don't enjoy standing still.
Recently, I've felt something different. It's a kind of need of company. I feel like staying and keeping a relationship with someone. Actually, I've ever felt this, but people never understood and repected my space. But I'm considering the idea of allowing myself to dive into a new relationship again. Someone has already said that it has something to do with maturation. As you get older, you feel the necessity of some stability. I do not really know if it's true.
Another big problem on all this is the person. Up till now, no one has understood me, no one has comprehended what I want. I know I should be more open, and I'm really trying hard. I'm not falling in love for anybody, though I've been felling something stronger than simple attraction for a girl. But it's to early to talk about that.
I just wish it wasn't too difficult for me to get involded with someone, because I want, and I need to.
posted by Renan C. Ferreira at 12:16:00 AM


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